


Little Tawny Riding Hood and the Yellow-eyed Wolf

by AdveturesofJo



Category: Supernatural
Genre: AU, Castiel likes bees, Crack, Demons, Fairy Tale Parody, Humor, M/M, Rachel is very religeous, You Have Been Warned, aunt!Rachel, this doesn't make any sense at all, wolf!Azazel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-03
Updated: 2014-09-03
Packaged: 2018-02-15 09:46:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,668
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2224452
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AdveturesofJo/pseuds/AdveturesofJo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Parody of little red Riding Hood, starring Castiel as Little Red Riding Hood, Azazel as the wolf, Rachel and the Grandmother (she's an aunt in this fic) and Dean as the Hunter. </p><p>--"She did give him the advise not to talk to strangers  (“Yes mother, I know”), to tell aunt Rachel that she’s still invited to Sunday lunch after mass (“Yes mother, I’ll tell her”), and to stay on the path when he walked through the forest (“Mother, this is ridiculous, it’s only two miles. It is not possible to get lost there”).--</p>
            </blockquote>





	Little Tawny Riding Hood and the Yellow-eyed Wolf

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ChasingRabbits](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChasingRabbits/gifts).



> HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAREST HANNAH! (I don't even know what I'm doing here)

Once upon a time, there was a young man named Castiel. He always wore a tawny cape, which was given to him by his father before his death. Because of his attire, the people in the village sometimes called him “Little Tawny Riding Hood”, -even though there was nothing little about him, Castiel thought to himself. He never said that out loud though, he knew his mother would not find his musings amusing at all. Naomi was very conservative and he knew for sure she would not like the things Castiel and Balthazar had been up to, before Balth left to follow his troubadour dreams and travel across the land singing ballads of Castiel’s eyes -and probably his dick. Balthazar was unabashed like that.

 

One day on a Thursday, Naomi asked Castiel to take some fruit and mead to his aunt Rachel, as she was confined to her bed with a cold. Why his mother couldn’t just go herself, Castiel didn’t know. It only seemed logical that she should go. Naomi could go out and show off her new fancy bonnet, a gift from Castiel’s douche bag neighbor Zachariah (the creep was after his mother’s wealth, he was certain of it). His aunt would be jealous and Naomi’s ego would be boosted for another two or three days. At most, of course, but it was worth it. Anything to not have to compliment her for every teeny tiny thing. Then again, Aunt Rachel was nice enough, and he didn’t want to subjugate her to his mother’s boring talk of ambition and “you should really move to the village Rachel dear, the forest is so muddy and there’s not even a proper hat store within a two mile radius”.

She did give him the advise not to talk to strangers  (“Yes mother, I know”), to tell aunt Rachel that she’s still invited to Sunday lunch after mass (“Yes mother, I’ll tell her”), and to stay on the path when he walked through the forest (“Mother, this is ridiculous, it’s only two miles. It is not even possible to get lost there”).

 

And thus, Castiel was on his way. He figured that since his aunt Rachel didn’t know he was coming, he might as well take his time and wander a bit off the path to watch the bees buzz and smell the flowers of the forest.

He thought he was alone. But then he felt the telltale prickle on his neck and he knew someone was watching him.

“Hello?”

A wolf sauntered through the bushes on Castiel’s left. But he wasn’t like any other wolf Castiel had ever encountered before (not like he _had_ ever encountered one, but he knew from stories and drawings how wolves looked. The wolves in the stories did _not_ have glowing yellow eyes.)

Castiel knew quite a bit about nature's creatures (no matter what Balthazar told him, monkeys were damned clever) so he knew that this was not a regular wolf. This was only confirmed when the wolf… _talked?_!?

“Well hello there young man! Aren’t you a sight to see! What is a fine specimen such as yours doing here, wandering all alone in this dark scary forest?”

“You talk.” was Castiel’s bright response.

“I do”, said the wolf.

“Wolves don’t talk” replied Castiel.

“Maybe I’m not a regular wolf then” smirked the wolf, a dangerous glint in his yellow eyes.

“Well, maybe I’m not interested to continue this conversation. If you’d excuse me, I have bees to watch and flowers to pick and an aunt to tend to.” With that, Castiel turned his back to the wolf and resumed picking beautiful blue flowers of which he didn’t know the name, but they smelled really nice and the bees seemed to like them, so that was that.

 

Now, this wolf- his name was Azazel- decided he would tap that. And then, for good measure, eat that. Because hot damn, this Castiel guy was really good looking. He remembered the young man said something about an aunt, and because there was only one house in the entire forest (who would want to live secluded in a tiny wooden cabin in a creepy forest was beyond him) so that would probably be the house of the aunt. This would be a piece of cake. Or, well, pieces of limbs and juicy bloody bodies.

Azazel went to the cabin as quickly as his four-feeted form could carry him. He didn’t bother to knock, threw open the door, jumped the aunt –a blond little thing- and ate her whole. Then, he used his weird complicated demonic powers to make himself look like the woman he just consumed completely. All he had to do now was wait.

 

In the meantime, Castiel had decided that he had collected enough flowers. He planned on giving some to Aunt Rachel -she was his favorite aunt after all- and then he still had enough left to keep some for himself.

When Castiel arrived at his aunt’s house, the door was slightly ajar. Frowning, he pushed the door open, only to be overwhelmed by the smell of…rotten eggs? He scrunched up his nose and called out: “Aunt Rachel, why does it smell so bad in here?”

“That’s to improve my sense of smell; I heard it’s a good remedy for a stuffed nose”

Castiel figured that it may indeed be true that once you start smelling that foul scent, you could be pretty certain the cold was over.

He then approached the bedroom, only to notice that the little altar next to the bedroom door was turned over and its contents were scattered all over the hallway.

“Aunt Rachel, why is your house altar all messed up?”

“That’s to improve my agility; it’s a good exercise to try not to trip over things when I leave my bedroom.”

Now that was the shittiest excuse Castiel had ever heard. One, his aunt was very much in shape, two, _why would someone ruin their most prized possession for a little exercise???_

Castiel entered the room now. When he saw Aunt Rachel, he immediately stopped in his tracks.

“Aunt Rachel…Why are your eyes yellow?”

“Because I’m not your aunt Rachel you fool!” his not-aunt screamed as she flung herself from under the covers. She started shifting and turned into a giant _yellow-eyed_ wolf. Castiel yelled, tried to run, tripped over the stupid altar, and the wolf swallowed him whole. Not even in the good way, like Balthazar would, but actually swallowed his entire body in one go.

Azazel then felt the call of one of his demon buddies, a white eyes named Lilith. His vessel would be no use in Hell, so he decided to climb in bed and leave his vessel there for the time being. Lilith was a big name in the demon world and she was not known for her patience. So he smoked out of the wolf and travelled through the earth, all the way to hell.

 

Now, Azazel was quite mistaken when he assumed no one would enter the cabin; a young hunter named Dean had heard Castiel’s cries and went to investigate. When he saw the demon smoke out of the wolf, he knew that this was his chance.

Dean ran over to the body of the wolf but just as he was about to hack it into pieces, he heard muffled words come from inside the wolf’s belly.

“…no of course not. You know how she is. She wouldn’t be kind to others even if it saved her life!” and then another voice “Well, let’s hope she at least sends someone to come search you. If I die, I want a proper burial.”

Dean knew he had no time to waste and slashed the wolf’s throat. Out came not only quite a lot of blood adn icky goo, but also a beautiful young man and a kinda hot middle aged woman.

“You saved us!” the woman cried out. “Thank you so much! My name is Rachel and this is my nephew Castiel.”

“Well hello there Rachel and Castiel, my name is Dean.”

“Hello Dean” said Castiel and man, that voice. While Rachel’s was sweet like an angel’s, Castiel sounded like he gurgled with metal scraps and whiskey every morning. _Hot._

“Are you guys okay?” Dean asked.

“I have a cold and a dire need for a shower, but besides that I’m fine, thank you” Rachel said.

Castiel didn’t really say anything, but he stared at Dean. Dean stared back. Rachel coughed once, and then went out to take her shower.

“So…Castiel. Would it be okay if I accompanied you back home after I take care of the not-wolf? Just to make sure you’re safe of course.”

“I’m not opposed to that, though maybe we could take the longer route back to the village and…get to know each other a little better?”

Dean felt his face heat up and his pulse quicken. He studied Castiel some more and noticed that he wasn’t the only one blushing. Castiel’s cheeks were gorgeously flushed and his pupils were dilated.

“Now that’s a good idea” he said.

Dean carved an antipossesion sigil into the wolf's skinn and drew some protective symbols on the walls of the house. Rachel was safe.

 

Castiel yelled his greetings at his aunt, grabbed Dean’s hand and pulled him outside.

Two steps later, they were kissing.

Five steps later, Dean was pulling at his vest.

Fifteen steps later, they tumbled in the bushes to have a tumble in the bushes. And that was that.

 

When they were both sated, happy and dressed again, Dean pressed another kiss to Castiel’s puffed up kissed out lips. They said their goodbyes (“I’ll see you tomorrow, second lane on the left of the church right?” “Yes, just come in through my window, or else my mother will have a fit”) kissed one last time, and went to their respective homes.

They both needed to wash up for their date tomorrow.

END


End file.
